so, no evidence of my untimely death yet.
there's this casing that encloses the esophogus(sp?), the trachea, etc. right behind the sternum which shows 'bumpier' than it's supposed to be in my chest x-ray. so, i think by my appointment time he was wanting to have been done conferring with the radiologist as to my being ct scanned. that did not happen and so i await word as to when i go in for that.
meanwhile, two different blood cultures and some other tests were done today as well.
my doctor says he is being cautious and just wants to cover all the bases..he also told me, chuckling, that i ought not to have been worried because he describes himself as a thorough physician. he's also quite nice and quite ready to explain things to me. he says he thinks it might be posture as i have a slight slump to the shoulders and perhaps i wasn't standing up entirely straight during the test.
should i allow myself to indulge in a little worry, though? i looked up these glands that he mentioned, the ones that sprout off of this casing in my chest. turns out i found enough evidence to support the fact that with abnormalities in this region, there's one common diagnosis. the c-word: cancer.
i am trying to rationalize that i do not feel ill(yea, like that has anything to do with anything), that i have had no fevers or sicknesses(though i did have those mysterious red bumps that eventually disappeared)and that there is no cancer in my immediate family tree.
course, i was a freely inhaling carcinogen machine for all of 11 years.
tonight as i was getting k. ready for bed, he asked for an extra cuddle. when i asked him why, he said, cause, it could happen any time, mommy..that i wouldn't be able to wake you up.